RANDOM MUSINGS AT THE MOVIES LAST WEEK

The week that passed by gave enough to cheer but still with a tear.After the debacle of Veer the earth had regained its composure to brace itself for another attack on its poor souls, humans who apprently according to a scientist in Australia are but descendants of an alien world.And so it must be that we are always looking out for some otherworldly entertainment that makes us sweep off our feet.Thinking that his next flick would have us all grounded to earth,Ram Gopal Varma prayed to the heavens, had a tete a tete with the cast and upon consulting with the stars and pacifying the activists who were angered about his fidgeting with the Jan Gan Mann as Jan Gan Rann thought his Rann would have the audience running.And did it happen??? Oh yeah...the audience ran towards the exit faster than Usain Bolt.But the reviews told us something else...didnt they...I know I know... but most of the audience stayed back to witness Amitabh's monologue that possibly was hinted towards a certain director,after signing whose movie, Sudeep decided to fall off the terrace in the movie.Hopefully,he had a bus waiting for him to take him on a roadtrip.Thinking thus, Vishal Bharadwaj and Abhishek Chaubey decided it was time to breath life into the lives of million useless souls like me who burn all their hard earned money on movies and some rotten corn that has a huge opportunity cost of 100 bucks a pack just because the corn pops out in a simulated air conditioned environment And so were we transported to the dust and mist of Uttar Pradesh only to be greeted by a fiesty pair of actors par excellence. But,after all the fun and having blown up most of the money at the theaters for two movies that did not really have a far reaching impact, it would have been wonderful, if STARSHIP ENTERPRISE could have jettisoned us back to some remote location in outerspace,with of course a rechargeable laptop for company that could have possibly reached out to the signals of a new ET flick. But who knows for all the effort you may have downloaded Shaktimaan rerun 5000 with an old Mukesh Khanna playing a crossover between Bhism pitamaha  and a superhero in a cheap suit that would have Batman cringing and Superman raging..So much for a film that hoped to make it to the Annals of the Film Academy and the undying hope and tenacity of man to still invest a cool 200 bucks every week on a movie that at the end of the day does one thing for sure..reach out for a Pepsi or a disprin..Take your pick.......
Signing Off
Eashwar

GOA IS BREEZY AND JOCULAR

It is amazing to think that some movies are just made to make all feel good and take you back to a time when movies were watched to bring in some cheer into our sullen lives.Now thats the kind of movies that Venkat Prabhu is known for making and he does live up to his reputation with his latest offering in Tamil, GOA.This maiden production venture of Soundarya Rajinikanth, does not delve into the complexities of life and just aims to get you to have a whale of a time at the theater.
The movie focusses on three characters Vinayagam(Jay), Ramarajan(Vaibhav) and Samikannu(Premji Amaren) who are a fun loving group that are constrained by their village which considers it taboo to leave the village.Driven by their urge to enjoy life as it should be, the trio escape to Madurai,wherein upon dashing into their friend's marriage to a white woman, make it their goal to seek a partner in a westerner and live the fabulous life abroad.After exploring some possible options of seeking their goal, the group lands in Goa and has a whale of a time chasing bikini clad women and enjoying the Goan life,until each meets their partner and returns home.

While fundamentally, the story is not great, the approach is quite interesting. Filled with spoofs of tamil movie situations and songs, the movie offers some pure entertainment. Sampath and Arvind as a gay couple excel in playing their roles well enough to have you in splits.Premji Amaren energizes the show with his comic timing along with the rest of the cast including Sneha , Prasanna, and Silambarasan in guest appearences. Yuvan Shankar Raja complements this comic caper with some amazing background scores. While the GOA soundtrack may sound stange when you hear it for the first time, the songs add a great deal in highlighting the comic timing in the movie. Its interesting to see that none of the characters in the movie aim to prove their act.All this happens to flow out effortlessly and you are clealry led to believe in the holiday that the trio enjoy.
Replete with punchlines and tacky situations, Venkat Prabhu does not clealry talk of a story here. Nevertheless, you leave the theater feeling refreshed when classic filmmaking has been attributed to focussing on a serious subject and grim performances. Further, the slick filming by Venkat offers respite to our eyes which has you interested and laughing at the follies of the characters.Drawing generously from some popular songs like Kangal Irundhal from Subrahmanyapuram and some popular Illayaraja scores, the GOA team repeats its act in Saroja and Chennai 600028.
While the movie makes you feel good, the second half of the movie stretches and introduces some lame plots that make the movie a tad long.Given that there are spoofs, the team does not expect you to take it seriously when Premji gets into the Vijay act in Vettaikaran , while fighting goons and saving his girlfriend.
At the end of the day, the movie is intended to be short vacation of sorts and you are advised not to go looking for some plot but enjoy the parody that Venkat and team have to offer with all its cheekyness but still gets aimless as if the director has lost sight of what he wanted to originally communicate.Despite passing over the confusion, GOA works because of its ability to make you feel light after a hard days work.That said, GOA is worth a watch if u have been stressed out for a long time, but its definitely not as masterful as a Saroja or Chennai 28 that leaves the film with 3.5 out of 5 for making you laugh and letting you have some fun while you are at it.Take a break and catch the movie. You may just end up saying..enna kodumai saar idhu ( what torture),evalovo pannitom idha pannamaatoma (we have done soo much, wont we do this afterall) in chorus with Premji and gang.
Signing Off....
Eashwar

ISHQIYA IS PURE ENTERTAINMENT!!

There are movies and then there are movies.When you are wondering and feeling wasted about your gambit at the movies week on week, the Gods decide to shower some mercy and thus comes along a movie like Ishqiya that has you looking at cinema as it should be-entertaining. The latest offering by Vishal Bharadwaj,directed by debutante Abhishek Chaubey offers a dark comedy in Ishqiya,that compels you to appreciate intelligent humor and at the same time lets you be.
The movie opens in the heartland of Uttar Pradesh,a muse that has stuck with Vishal Bharadwaj for sometime now.Rustic and blatant, the surroundings offer a perfect pitch to set the mood of its central characters Khalujan(Nasseruddin Shah), his accomplice Babban(Arshad Warsi) who are thieves, one brooding and the other lusty, that cheat their boss of some hard cash and find a refuge in the idyllic villages outside Gorakhpur in a certain Krishna(Vidya Balan),who apprently is the widow of a certain leader of the numerous factionist groups in the state. During the course of their stay both Babban and Khalujan in their own way get hooked to the demeanour of Krishna,who apprently has her own agenda and plays along until she wins their confidence and has them plan the kidnapping of a small time millionaire and extort money  and make merry. But all is not as it seems.Sleight and deceit become part of this cat and mouse game that delightfully complicates a straightforward plan into one that ends up involving the fascist groups after a point and has the trio claim their stake.
The movie deserves to be applauded for its treatment,that osscillates between a comic caper and an intense thriller of sorts dangerously enough and its the skill of Abhishek Chaubey and Vishal Bharadwaj that enables the script maintain its fine balance and has you laughing even when people are being shot at. Much of the entertainment factor in the movie comes from the dialogues that are impactful in driving the movie forward.
Sample this: "Humne galti karne mein thodi jaldi kardi, aapne maafi maangne mein thodi deri" Coupled with Arshad Warsi's spontaineity and reprising the "Circuit" act, the comic punch lines clearly come out as gems of intelligent positioning in the movie. Needless to say,Nasseeruddin Shah as Khalujan is every bit the spurned lover and a man seasoned by experience who slips well into his erratic moodswings more than once.Its a pleasure to watch Naseeruddin Shah go reclusive and communicate his pain to Krishna after his realization of her feelings for Babban ,in these very lines " Main Mard hoon isiliye bata nahin raha hoon. Agar aurat hota toh tumhe pata nahi chalta ki mein biwi hoon ki tawaif" .After a long time,Vidya Balan comes around to prove her mettle as Krishna, a woman with grey shades, an avengeful seductress who feigns her inclinations for Babban and Khalujan only to scheme a way to grab the booty. You cant but help admire the boldness of the character essayed by Vidya Balan that fluxes between a cold and affectionate demeanour by the minute.Scenes where she takes the duo by surprise and holds them captive and drives away with the kidnapped businessman while Babban and Khalujan fight in the middle of the road, is quite exciting. There are many moments in the movie that have you root for the characters at some point.
Complementing the movie is the music by Vishal Bharadwaj that has some great scores that would linger in your mind well after you have left the cinema hall. The cinematography by Mohana Krishna Agapu offers a pleasant experience and editing by Namrata Rao offers the streaming narrative some crisp time management .
However, it  does take a while to warm up to the situations and characters of this two hour flick that is possibly attributed to the unpredictability of situations and the effort of the director to tie all of them together into what makes Ishqiya, an enjoyable piece of entertainment and storytelling that is here to stay and hence scales 3.5 out of 5 for its attempt to be different and successful at that!!
Heres to Ishqiya for making popcorn the best accompaniment at the movies.

Signing Off.....
Eashwar

Rann is Unidimensional and Amitabh is its saving Grace!!!!

All dark and grim maketh not a Godfather.That sums up Rann,the latest offering from the Ram Gopal Varma stable.Backed by a great cast, Rann very simply is Madhur Bhandarkar's Corporate refashioned and made to look chic with the twist that only a Ramgopal Varma could provide. Vijay Harshwardhan, played by the legendary Amitabh Bachan, is the owner of a news channel, India TV that prefers truth over TRPs and tends to continue so even as a competing news channel run by an ex employee of India TV,played by Mohnish Behl, rumored to be inspired by the Prannoy Roy-Rajdeep Sardesai split, races forward to notch up all worldly indicators of success, albeit through unfair means. Intending to salvage the channel, Jai Harshvardhan, the America returned son of Vijay, essayed by Sudeep, is manipulated into becoming an accomplice to a political conspiracy orchestrated by a sinister Paresh Rawal in return for better channel viewership. In the backdrop, the  rival channel notches up a few games up its sleeve that attempt to tarnish the image of India TV and eating  into the pie, while  a righteous young journalist played by Ritesh Deshmukh who reveres the patriarch at India TV and goes all out as a one man army to uncover the conspiracy and save Vijay Harshwardhan who apparently is being used as a pawn in this political quagmire and succeeds in helping the channel uphold its original vision and mission.
The only thing that is common between Ramgopal Varma's Sarkar, Sarkar Raj and Rann , apart from the obvious towering presence of Big B is a dark background and a webcameraish approach to the film, so much so, you wish you could pull the remote out of Ramu's hands and adjust the hue on the screen.
The movie drags itself through the first half,establishing the credentials of the news channel and there is little of Big B that is heard, who limits himself to reading the news through the entire 1.5 hrs. Its only during  the second half that the movie almost falls into track and comes close to driving a point or two home.However,  the movie fails to offer a convincing view of the media and dissapoints one too many making you feel as if you were travelling in a Volkswagen of the 1920s on a bumpy road. The script simply refuses to kickstart and takes a convoluted approach to make a simple statement.
The script and sets of the movie affirm that Rann is a product of inadequate research and unidimensional perception. Not once, are you lead to believe that people in the respective competitors offices are engaged in serious work. While some are busy making a parody of sorts,others are busy selling secrets to rival channels or walking around hither-thiter without much to offer.If that were not enough,the background score and soundtrack has you asking for Sandeep Chowta who was once a regular in the Ramgopal Varma camp and  a reckoning force that had you glued to the seats,just for the beauty of the scores. The jarring tunes composed by a dozen music directors, do not gel well with the flow of the story and rather complement the tone of the camerawork by Amit Roy that is erratic and made to appear dark and amateurish,to give the so called "Sarkar" effect.
However, inspite of these follies, the talented among the cast,put in their best efforts to work around a sketchy character description except for possibly Amitabh Bachchan who has received the best scripted role amongst the lot. Given the potential and success of Paresh Rawal in the past in the garb of negativity, Ram Gopal Varma does not exploit it adequately and it so appears that he gave Paresh a free hand to work out the details of his character. But, the directors actor that Paresh Rawal is, he has put in his best efforts and yet the superficial character description fails to justify his effort. Mohnish Behl, for his part as the owner of a competing channel is sincire and believable.Ramu's muse since Phoonk, Sudeep demonstrates potential for growth and demonstrates the transition from an obedient son to an avaricious businessman with some conviction.Ritesh Deshmukh as the young and sincire journalist has you striking a chord at certain points,while the rest of the cast including Suchitra Krishnamurthy, Neetu Chandra,Gul Panag and Rajat Kapoor along with extras appear more like last minute additions to fill up the spot,and hence have limited breadth and scope to perform.

But, Rann is  salvaged by the effort of one man alone, Amitabh Bachchan, who rises up to the challenge of a poor script and How!!. Every frame that captures him dressed in impeccable suits has you rooting for him and empathizing with his character and vulnerability. The frequent flux across the states of mind of Vijay Harshvardhan are protrayed effectively through his silence that conveys volumes,until the last 30 minutes that is by far the best segment of the movie. Clearly, Ram Gopal Varma is a huge fan of Amitabh Bachchan  has reserved the best part of his script and lines for the last,to let the Angry Young Man rise and speak. The  emotional turmoil and confessional speech articulated by Bachchan ,especially the line wherein he voices " Media ek Lakshya tha aur Paisa ek Madhyam par ab Paisa ek Lakshya aur Media ek Madhyam sirf Madhyam, ban gaya hai" pulls some strings and leaves your throat choking, delivered in a manner that is so very Bachchan.

With not much to talk about, and Bachchan being its only saving grace, the movie scales 3 POINTS out of 5 for Amitabh's class act and is recommended only if you want to enjoy the last thirty minutes of the movie which gives you enough reason for Big B to be considered the true Sarkar of modern Hindi cinema.

Movies To Check Out This Week: Couples Retreat, Rann, Ishqiya, Road to Sangam,Up in the Air

The week of 29th sees an interesting lineup of movies after the drought of scripts and acting that was witnessed until recently.

COUPLES RETREAT : At long last,India gets to witness the first post Oscar Hollywood venture of whizkid A.R.RAHMAN. Starring Vince Vaughn and Jean Reno, this Universal Pictures presentation directed by Peter Billingsley, a major telly star,  focuses on the lives of four couples at different stages of their  relationship who go on a vacation somewhere in the Bahamas, a place called Eden ,where they meet a yoga instructor,played by Jean Reno who counsels them on gelling well and making the best of their romatic lives.
Positioned as a comedy, Couples Retreat released in October 2009 and met with great success grossing over $150 million worldwide,but was not much appreciated by critics for the shallow portrayal and uninspiring theme.Interestingly,Couples Retreat was offered to A.R.Rahman,before he started off on Slumdog Millionaire. The music was recorded entirely in the United States with the Hollywood Studio Symphony and released by Relativity Music Group in October 2009. Incidentally, the tracklist of the album has one track written in Hindi and another written in Tamil,penned by A.R.Rahman himself.The song "Na Na" from the album has been nominated in the Best Song category at the Oscars.

Pre Movie Verdict : The fact that this is A.R.Rahman's first mainstream Hollywood assignment,would make this a crowdpuller,by virtue of the brillant background scores he is known for. Its possible that the sales of the audio released by SaReGaMa in India would pick up post the movie. The movie may do average business in India. Check it out to get a feel of ARs background.Something you may not want to miss!!

RANN: For some strange reason, Rann that was originally poised to release during the week of 22nd January is showing up finally on 29th January. At the risk of being repetitive,this Ram Gopal Varma film that has a fine breed of acting to flaunt in Amitabh Bachchan, Paresh Rawal,Ritesh Deshmukh,Gul Panag and Sudeep, the reigning star of the Kannada film industry,who was last seen in Phoonk, offers an interesting plot that takes a shot at the manipulation of the media.While speculations have been rife around the potential storyline, the air has been cleared by Big B and Ramu,who reveal that the plot revolves around the central character Vijay Harshvardhan,an owner of a popular news channel,who owing to some trying circumstances influenced by diabolical politicians conveys a false message through the news that impacts the lives of several people. The rest of the plot focuses on how he comes out of the mess and seeks justice against media manipulation.

Pre Movie Verdict: The trailers are dark and discomforting and that sets the tone for the movie and clearly sends out a message that Ramu is back with AB to stimulate serious thought as opposed to mindless munching of popcorn. Clearly, Amitabh has a huge role to play in this political thriller and it would be interesting to see Mr.Bachchan revert back to the image of the Angry Young Man of Deewar and Zanjeer,albeit in a sophisticated manner. Further, its almost twenty years since he played a character by the name Vijay which if you werent aware was the name of all characters he played since his entry into filmdom.
Going by Ramu's fetish for scripts that explore the intagibles and unknowns around the perceived reality we live in, Rann appears a winner hands down.For the first time,millions across India would get a glimpse of what happens within the news room. If not for anything else, Rann has sure notched up enough publicity with the media getting edgy on what Ramu wants to portray and that is bound to work in favour of the movie.
The movie should be worth a watch, put your thinking caps on and enjoy the magic of Amitabh Bachchan as the Angry Young Man all over again!!!

ISHQIYA: Now this is one movie,you dont want to miss! Master craftsman Vishal Bharadwaj strikes back after Omkara in 2006 and Kaminey in 2009, with a witty dark comic caper that has an ensemble of performers in Nasseruddin Shah, Arshad Warsi and Vidya Balan who play the game of love and deceit in a manner you would least expect.Known for coming up with innovative storylines and amazing music that keep you hooked,this time around,he lets debutant Abhishek Chaubey wield the megaphone as he turns a complete producer. The movie depicts the lives of three persona, two gangsters and a widow, or should we say a black widow.... Arshad Warsi and Nasseeruddin play two partners in crime who escape their boss with a booty and seek refuge in a safe place, ironically under the shelter of a forgotten widow of their boss,essayed by Vidya Balan. Oblivious and ignorant, the two get busy proclaiming their love for her only to be set on a death trap by the woman they are blinded by love and lust.

Pre Movie Verdict: The movie has all the ingredients to set the cash registers ringing.Both the trailers and music by Vishal Bharadwaj have caught on like a house on fire and for the first time, he attempts a dark comedy unlike his previous films wherein comedy was a certain forced element but stuck largely to the serious nature of the plot. Arshad Warsi reprises his 'Circuit" act by playing sidekick to the awesome Naseeruddin Shah whose recent performance in 'A Wednesday' had us asking for more. In all probability, we are going to see a mix of the gangster he played in Kaizad Gustad's sleeper hit Bombay Boys and Mithya.Vidya Balan charters into unfamiliar territory with this film. Depending on her portrayal of the negative shades of her character, Vidya Balan could well bounce back and carve a niche for herself as a character actress. Definitely worth picking  our brains  on this one and give it the much desired break to sit back,relax and enjoy a delightful experience come alive on screen, of course with the essentials:a tub of popcorn and a glass of Coke - Gimme a Large, Please.

Road To Sangam : If you are in the mood to go patriotic this week in keeping with the republican spirit, then Road to Sangam could well be your best bet at the movies for the week.Inspired by a true story about a mechanic who restored a car that carried the ashes of Mahatma Gandhi to the sangam.Directed by debutant Amit Rai who notched up the film based on the story, the film has found positive reviews  and raked in awards at the Mumbai Academy of the Moving Image Film Festival, International Film Festival of South Africa and the Radar Hamburg Film Festival,Germany.The fact that potentially makes this film interesting is the presence of stalwarts such as Om Puri and Paresh Rawal,who have proved time and again that a movie can be carried entirely on their shoulders.
Pre Movie Verdict : The movie may draw an average response, considering that the focus on contemporary history has taken a backseat,with most of the audience wanting to get a feel for comedy and adventure. With limited promotional activities, the movie could run at multiplexes.There is a possibility of the movie being chosen as a dvd/vcd flick. Nevertheless,  an epic performance by Paresh Rawal as the disturbed Muslim mechanic awaits us...Go for it, if u are a fan of true cinema.

UP IN THE AIR: The Golden Globe Nominated winner for best adapted screenplay and nomination in the screen guild actors award starring George Clooney touches base on  Indian theaters and is a movie you would love watching for either of the following reasons:

a. You are a Fan of George Clooney b. You are intrigued by the life of management consultants c.You wanna get  a feel of what it is to travel 365 days a year d. You want to empathize and sympathize with yourself if u already have been there and done that.
Either way, this film, an adaptation of the 2001 novel by Walter Kirn,directed by Jason Reitman the Canadian director who is known for movies such as Juno and Thank You for Smoking, focuses on the life of Ryan Bingham, a downsizing consultant, played by the legendary George Clooney and travels the world to lay off  employees.He prefers the kind of life he lives because of his personal aspiration earn 1 million air miles that has so far been the achievement of a privileged few. He is pitted with a junior Natalie Keener played by Anna Kendrick,last seen in Twilight who is pushing the envelope to go economical by getting the firings done through the internet and over the telephone. It would be interesting to see whether Ryan Bingham does achieve those airmiles he dreams of and at whose expense.

Pre Movie Verdict : The story is a refreshing take on the reality of management consultants and given that it has George Clooney heading the show, it sure is going to receive a great opening.Adding to the stellar cast, is the nomination of the movie in the Golden Globes and the Screen Guild Awards,which is certain to drive the sales of tickets over the next couple of weeks.A clear winner that you must check if you are in the mood for some introspection or even plain fun. Have a blast.

Phew..thats a lot to catch up this week.Make sure you have enough money stashed away or ask your boss for an advance pay if you are planning to watch all of them.The last one is strictly for the impatient few among us..

Signing Off...
Eashwar

Random Musings at the Movies Last Week

The week behind was a rather eventful one at the movies and will go down history as one that had a huge impact on all allied industries except the movie that was behind the apocalypse. The solitary release of the week -Veer impacted some before its release and some after,but never did a movie go so far that the heavens shied away for an entire day to shield themselves from an asteroid called SALZARAS2212010(Salman, Zarine and Anil Sharma followed by the release date of Veer ,if you already didnt have a clue of what that meant)that was created by the amalgation of the creative energies of a certain muscular character called Salman Khan who was intrigued by the beauty of a fatso called Zarine Khan that was until the time busy selling Parag sarees even after they went bankrupt.Twas,one fine night, two years ago,when hunky Sallu was at the pub down Pali Hill, in an exalted state, he happened to stumble on a certain Anil Sharma who by virtue of shooting an impossible sequence of Sunny Deol pulling out a handpump during his last patriotic venture,Gadar, was elevated to the status of a film maker par excellence. As luck would have it, Gadar Sharma had a script  that he thought was just right for Salman. but HUNKY 100 pushups gave him a cold shoulder and unleashed a parchment  from  his wallet that  had a while ago been home to a handful of groundnuts.Voila!!! what does our man find...a story that he had scripted 500 centuries ago during his last incarnation as a tribal warrior in the jungles of Amazon. He remembered rather vaguely that he had sent the script to Mel Gibson through a time travel machine he had borrowed from the makers of the Denzel Washington movie,Deja Vu. However, Gibson was already working on the preproduction of Apocalypto that had a storyline notches above the contrived script of Veer. The fact that Apocalypto failed to make an impact is another matter.But,given that the fallibale nature of humans make them consider themselves infallible, made Salman conceited  and restless enough that he consumed a 100 gallons of Red Bull at the pub and with  infectious enthusiasm convinced Anil Sharma the far reaching impact of the script and the industries that would become profitable as a result.The first of those unfortunate camps to be affected was the tomato ketchup industry. Maggi and Kissan were specially advised to import tomatoes from Spain and Italy that were red enough to give blood a complex.The communication sent the tomato farming community in India in a dizzy,who decided it was time to inflate the prices and go Keynesian enough to have householders across the subcontinent reach out for fries at McDonalds.Satisfied with the outcome and enthused by the possibility of winning a National Award, Anil Sharma got the Queen of England to  temporarily shift her base from the Buckingham Palace to Chandini Chowk,where he heard Mithun Chakraborty was busy selling his high end vada pav specially imported from China.  Meanwhile,Salman decided that Zarine Khan was not a beauty but a bison from the hilly terrains of Kanchenjunga and fumed and fretted across the world so much so that Anil Sharma almost lost hope of winning a National Award. But, Almighty dear sucked by the plight of Gadar handpump Sharma, consoled him with a brilliant piece of news that suggested a certain village belle who just a couple of weeks ago was impossible with her pyar,won the National Award along with a 20 something Ranaut,who was run out for a long time until Madhur was sweet enough to shower his treasure(thats Bhandar in Hindi) on her. Delighted with this piece of news, Anil renewed his enthusiasm and got the censor board to pass off the movie with a UA certificate,who apparently were miffed by the stunts that they literally wanted to replicate a scene from the movie that would make the stomach crawl-wring Salman's neck and Anils Wrist,so that they may think straight and never make a lousy movie as this respectively.
The decision by the censor board to release Veer on Friday didnt augur well with the sensibilities of Ram Gopal Varma, who felt that Anil's films were not worth the mettle and competition.As a consequence, Ramu decided to run and let Rann on the 29th instead 22nd . Now thats what I call responsible behaviour and strategy well crafted.However, Ram Gopal Verma wanted to check a similar fiasco from erupting and hence went online to discuss with each of his starcast  what they thought about his movie. Now,given that all actors in the movie were sincire employees, the answers were polite and politically well crafted. However, the lead of the movie, the Big B of indian cinema had to bear the brunt of politeness and etiquette by answering a press conference of 200 newsmen that got him harried enough to find solace in the cosy seats of PVR Bangalore,where the Chief Minister of Karnataka and his battalion of chieftains,wanted a line by line translation of Paa. Worried,that the Big B may silently escape the tirade and not satisfy the request, the team made sure that food was all vegetarian and served at the seat. As soon as he was released from the iron clutches, Big B was pleasantly surprised to see the entire Bangalore throng around to get a glimpse of their favourite star,who apprently was both  puzzled  and immensly touched by the fact that after all, his darshan was balmy and comforting to all those Bangaloreans,who were affected by the indelible impact of asteroid SALZARAS2212010 that I hear finally landed on a place called Morocco,  which by the way is  known for Ibn Batuta and leather that you are  especially advised to put to good use if u see that duo come around on screen again.
Signing Off....
Eashwar

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VEER IS A COLOSSAL WASTE OF TOMATO KETCHUP AND THE TAX PAYERS MONEY!!!

Has there ever been a time when you have  pulled through a movie, only to focus your energies on two tubs of popcorn, three packets of samosa and five scoops of icecream to keep you engaged, out of guilt?If you havent,then you must watch Veer, as it doles out a couple of lessons on the advantages of being indifferent.
This Vijay Gilani production of an Anil Sharma movie scripted by our very own Salman Khan,has you making more trips to the candy bar than the frequency of Salmans bare chested act.

Setup as a battle between an obscure alcoholic  tribe in Rajasthan,thePindharis and the Rajputs during British RAJ, this three hour yarn has Salman Khan play Veer,the son of Mithun Chakraborty , a Pindhari who seeks to avenge the injustice meted out to his clan of hooligans by a Rajput king essayed by Jackie Shroff, through his allegiance to the British feifdom.So it must be that Veer as a baby is drenched in the rain by Mithun who justifies his act by proclaiming him to be a Pindhari.Poor child, i hope the parents of that unfortunate soul had immunized it with the 100 odd vaccinations before handing it over to our man of the moment-Mithun. As expected the child grows to be a man enough, who goes about chopping hands and bathing in alcohol every once in a while, until he meets Yashodhara, a woman of royal lineage played by newbie Zarine Khan,that gets him out of his stupor and woo her in the most predictable manner.The remaining bit of the first half focusses on his effort to get to her and a bit of history lessons,like being sent to the University College London, to understand the ways of the British or posing to be royal enough to vanquish the white skinned mortals.Now why does one have to demean a great institution like UCL to understand British ways and manners and when did tribals get admitted there?Post interval, this torture of a saga continues with the protagonist coming in contact with the brothers of his love interest played by Puru Rajkumar and Aryan Vaid, both of whom look like they have been woken inbetween a time travel experiment, fizzed out and clueless. The movie snails further from cliche to cliche that begins with Veer arriving at the opportune moment to save his brother with an unfathomable name,played by Sohail Khan ,takes a break with Jackie Shroff and Zarine Khan proclaiming to be father and daughter and ends, with Salman Khan marrying her at the risk of knocking off her father and being born  as his son after being conked off in a silly bullet dodging exercise.

While there is no doubt that Salman is a star, frankly, he is no Russell Crowe or Mel Gibson which he tries hard to be like.However, ironically, it is his presence in the movie that makes this ketchup fest a wee bit palatable. Zarine Khan as princess Yashodhara does not emote  well enough to justify her act or selection. She is no more than a pretty face prancing around and emoting oh so minimally. The leading lady of this flick   would do well to get some serious workouts in order to sustain a long innings apart from wholesome tips and treats on acting and emotion.

Director Anil Sharma seems to have taken a fascination for patriotic movies but does not demonstrate the sophistication desired of a historical epic of some proportion as Veer. The usage of graphics that are quick to be differentiated by the untrained eye and average camerawork do not warrant for a great historical adventure. Music by Sajid-Wajid and the background score by Monty offer nothing new and are inspired pieces that crop up every once in a while almost sounding like caller ringtones that signal the arrival of Veer to Yashodhara.How banal.

Considering that the script has been in the making for long and so has the movie, the crew of Veer could have potentially put the money invested, to good use rather than resorting to on screen situational and technical cliches that remind one of movies made four generations ago, a la Manmohan Desai  and BR Chopra.

All said and done, this movie scores 1 out of 5 for  having wasted the efforts of the tomato ketchup industry,that otherwise could have  improved the taste of the last plate of samosa at the snack bar.

Signing Off.....
Eashwar